5 Things to help you discover your True Self

Who are you?

  Most of society doesn’t really know who they are. Psychologists may know because of their extensive and the tools they have learned to help others. But we don’t. I have a friend who spent many 10s of thousands of dollars to get help to better understand himself and many years of therapy. How do we find our true self in a society that doesn’t want to see you as you are? 

Societies View

  We live in a society that rewards those who put on the person of those who they work for. Corporations for the last fifty or sixty years have defined a successful person as a follower. Movies and television have reinforced that stereotype with shows like “Leave it to Beaver, Father knows Best, etc.” I think we are now in a transitional period where people understand that what has been isn’t working for everyone. As we change our society because of the Pandemic’s impact, it is an ideal time to change ourselves. We can find and express our true Self.

What is your true Self?

   Being true to yourself is about being authentic. 5 steps to help you find your true self are given below. Renee Brown says. “Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we’re supposed to be and embracing who we are.”  You probably know several people who studied and became one thing because their parents wanted them to be a lawyer, doctor, or to follow in their father’s footsteps. But often this didn’t work because they were miserable.  They wanted to paint, create things or care for people differently. As Renee Brown says we must embrace who we are.  

  That is easier said than done. For those of us in the engineering or hard science professions, getting in touch with ourselves is a foreign idea. We seldom delved deeply into our inner self to find our bliss. Our societal selves walk away from inequality and injustice because it is the government’s problem to handle. But we don’t vote because I am only 1 in 327 million and my vote doesn’t matter or we vote along party lines because they know what is right, and it is harder to think for myself than it is to follow the crowd.

Our society is at a crucial time and if we want it to continue; we have to become more self-aware, pay attention in a way we never have before, and rebuild ourselves and our country. Opening our eyes to what is going on around us and speaking the truth to power. In the next section are 5 steps to take to get you started on this hard journey.

5 Things to Start you on the Path to Finding your True Self.

  1. Build the Daily Habits that will make you more self-aware: If you tried to build new habits you know this can be difficult. I tried and failed many times until I tried a new coaching program this month with Dr. Pylin (https://drpylin.com). I highly recommend that you consider her program. After the first lesson, my mental barriers broke, and I began creating habits. Go to her website and look at her program. It changed my mind about my ability to make habits, taught me a method for designing and learning the habits I want in my life, and removed my mental resistance to habit formation.

  2. Develop Self-Awareness- find out who you are inside, what you like. What are your values? What do you want to be? And the tough one for me: How do you feel about yourself, others, your life? What feels the most natural for you?

  3. Accept yourself for who you are, not who you think you should be. We are all imperfect. We are too tall, too short, too heavy, too skinny, too weak., too introverted, or too extroverted. But we are who we are. We can only change certain of these things. But we have to accept the others. We are all born to be someone, we just need to find out who that is. Because we want to be the best we can be. 

  4. Don’t require others to validate you. The validation comes from accepting yourself. Start a journal and write about your dreams, thoughts, feelings and values. Write about your successes and difficulties. Start a journal is one of the Daily Habits that will help you on your journey to self-awareness.

  5. Start a meditation habit. This can be as simple as sitting, closing your eyes, and breathing in, holding, and breathing out. Meditation can be a part of your morning routine to get your day started or it can help you relax at night, so you sleep more soundly.

“One of the greatest regrets in life is being what others would want you to be, rather than being yourself.”
― Shannon L. Alder

The path to great confidence is not in becoming invincible, flawless, and seemingly perfect. But rather, it is in embracing your humanity, in all its messy glory and tender vulnerability.–Aziz Gazipura.